Name Numerology For No. 4
by Matthew James Williamson
(Toronto, Ontario, Canada)
When I first discovered name numerology, it was as if I had known it all along, but never knew what to call it. My date of birth is 12-08-1986. My day number is 3, my life number is 8 and my name number is 4. I have suffered a great deal and want to end it.
I could use some guidance or a referral to someone in Toronto or a payment plan or something. I truly need help and I don't know what to do. Name Numerology speaks to me everywhere I go and with everything I do.
It's been happening all my life and now that I'm 23 years old I have started to consciously notice it. Any advice would help. Sometimes, I think I am crazy and out of my mind as some of my friends and family would attest.
However, I am noticing that things which seem to happen appear to be too coincidental...as if meant to be. I have noticed that when I treat myself and the world as exalted, good things and good vibrations fill my soul.
When I do the wrong thing knowingly, I vibrate very low and my ego takes over. Several times it has tried to kill me. This is very hard to talk about, but being honest seems to help me. I read that the Demon's Head or Raahu is the ruler of the number 4.
I've noticed that when I meditate, enjoy nature, self-sacrifice, exercise and eat well, I feel terrific and vibrate at a higher level. When I choose to lie, cheat, steal or hurt myself or others in any way, my dark side takes over and tries to end me.
Recently, through discovering this website, I have been able to dissolve my ego/dark side/Demon's head, slightly, yet
it still seeks to destroy me and everyone around me. It tries to make deals with me, so that it can envelope me through my crown chakra.
Through practicing Trataka, meditating as well as eating and sleeping well, I have managed to regain control of my life. Sadly, a great deal of damage has already been done as I have burnt many bridges, hurt those who I love, wrecked my financial security, and committed crimes.
I want to atone for what I have done by being the change that I want to see in the world. Sadly, I can see that many people are afflicted with this same spiritual dilemma. I can see how this could be misconstrued as being a psychological disorder.
Or that my mind is justifying what I want to see, but I don't really think or feel that is the case. My lucky numbers in sports were 12 and 7, I've always had to work very hard to get what I want, even though I'm noticing that things seem to come very easy to others.
As I am writing this my conscience is clear, yet I desire to know the truth. What is the point of this life? Are we simply atoning for the sins of the past lives in an infinite birth/death cycle or are we just animals fighting for physical dominance?
I'd like to say that I'm simply a product of western society, yet I have the ability to choose and make my intentions manifest. Since becoming more aware, I'm noticing these problems afflicting many people I know, to the point where I can see it in their eyes.
Please clarify for me what I may be going through. I trust that you've heard similar stories. Thank you for reading and for your time.